Throughout my career, I’ve been responsible for managing different types of people. From Baby Boomers to Millennials, novices to seasoned, each employee brings their own unique personality, skills, and challenges to the job. But I’ve noticed lately that my role in managing people has really changed how I parent my children.
As the mom of three boys (11, 9 & 7 years old), it is admittedly often easier for me to do things myself to make sure they get done right. From cleaning up to packing lunches and completing homework assignments, I used to be very hands-on and would often jump in to help finish the job right.
I don’t do that anymore.
Being a manager, I now think about the skills I want my boys to have so they can be successful in the workplace. I want them to be given a task to complete and know that they will have the ability to figure out how to do it and the initiative to do it well. I’ve realized that my jumping in or hovering when they’re cleaning their rooms or completing their writing assignment for school is not going to help them later on in life. As an employee, you don’t often receive step-by-step instructions on how to complete a task and you certainly don’t get a trophy just for participating. Tasks require problem-solving skills, initiative and attention to detail. By micromanaging my boys now, I’m inhibiting their ability to develop these necessary skills.
I’ve started giving the boys more responsibility and the space to figure out how to problem solve and get it done. And if it’s not done correctly, give them some direction, but make them go back and do it right. I can think of a time when my son had a school project to complete, and he made it very clear to me that he was only going to do the bare minimum. Instead of forcing him to do more, I told him that it was his decision and he would have to live with the consequences. When he received a low grade and negative teacher comments, he was clearly embarrassed, and it was a valuable lesson. It was hard to let go knowing there would be negative consequences, but I’m glad I did.
Sometimes it’s hard to let go as a parent, but when you think about your children as future employees, it really puts things into perspective. You realize that you want them to have the drive and ability to succeed, and I as a parent have a huge influence on that.
